I have been reading a book called The Secret (pointed out to me by a very good friend) and that has led me on to another book called The Divine Matrix by Gregg Braden (the way these things happen, and no, it is nothing to do with The Matrix movie even though that is my fav movie of all time). I am going to have to say that this book is one of those pivotal books in life, full of ideas that make the brain cells fairly swish around in your skull pan with amazing energy and mobility.
I have always had an enquiring and ornery mind, up to its own tricks and doing its best to bludgeon some sort of sixth sense into me, but this book makes me feel as if everything I have ever read or thought has been leading up to this point. If I had not gone through and clean out the other side of Catholicism and Spiritualism, then golloped up large doses of feminism, earth religions, history in general, philosophy, astrology, tarot and THINKING in general, I would not actually be in the right space to understand or appreciate this book. Now you can see why I label myself as w e i r d? I am a Child of the Universe and I LOVE it.
I always knew I was not bound by mans power, that is not a new belief, but now I have a visual for this feeling. The feeling has become very deep, concrete and fixed somehow. I feel (and goodness knows I live in a soup of feelings, constantly!) that I am very, very close to all of creation - gosh that sounds so mad, but none-the-less true. I feel as if I could reach out and touch certain people I have very strong feelings for, even though they are in different countries to me. I feel so connected to everyone around me, I want to somehow boost them all, to make them LOOK around at the beauty that they live in, at the sheer miracle of life, at the expansiveness and possibility of ALL.
I hate to see the way some people walk around, looking down at the ground the whole time, have you seen them? What are they doing in their minds? Dont they see the glory of everything that is around them? In the smallest, most perfect flower, to the brightness and majestic presence of the hugest trees? To the clear and bright azure that is the sky? Their eyes are on the ground and the dirt and dust and their own feet? Gosh. What a waste. Of yet another glorious day.
Maybe the ultimate weirdness, although it seems perfectly logical to me, but I am still working on this with my mind looping and buzzing in a most alarming manner (do brains ever explode with the strain of thinking?), is that I do not believe in God. I dont. I believe in god in each and every one of us and in everything around us, every cell of the matrix! WE are god. and everything that we can see and everything that we cannot, is god. I am an Athiest who believes that there is no death, for anything or anyone. We live, we exist, we think, we ARE. Forever.
See? Loopy! ha ha!